Have You Ever Heard Of Iraq?

“Shut the fuck up Donny.”

If you’ve ever seen The Big Lebowski, you know that John Goodman’s character Walter loved bringing up his experiences in Vietnam. We now know that his buddies died lying face down in the muck, but most of the characters in the movie didn’t want to hear any of that. Similarly, I don’t want to hear about some Redneck asshole’s experiences in Iraq. That won’t stop them from telling me all about it though.

Winston: “Well sir, last summer the services were shut off due to non payment.”

Customer: “I already told you I wasn’t home. I was out of the country!”

Winston: “That may be, but since the account was still active, the charges continued to accrue on the account.”

Customer: “Let me ask you something. Have you ever heard of Iraq?”

No, I guess I slept through Geography 101 and have never watched the news in my entire life.

Winston: “Yes sir I have, but we need to get back to the matter at hand…”

Customer: “Last summer, I was in Iraq. Fighting in Operation Iraqi Freedom. I was fighting for democracy. For your freedom. For your neighbor’s.”

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