Winston Gets Hit On

In Montana, they have caution signs for deer. Other places have slightly different caution signs.

My calls are about 50/50. I’d say roughly 50% of the time the calls are uneventful and therefore amazing. 40% of the time a customer flips shit on me and has a fucking fit over something stupid. The other 10% are, well, just a little different…

Winston: “Okay ma’am, I think that settles your payment, you should be all good to. Is there anything else I can help you with today?”

Customer: “I know my nurse told me not to flirt, but I just can’t help it. Do you have yourself a wife Mr. Winston?”

Winston: “Um, no, but I don’t think this is…”

Oh no, this isn’t happening.

Customer: “Hot dog! How about a girlfriend?”

Nope, it’s happening. Better lay down the law and hang up before it gets any weirder.

Winston: “Yes, I do have a girlfriend, now is there anything else I can help you…”

Customer: “Ah, shoot! Well you call me if you ever break up.”

Yes, I’ll be sure to call the crazy Telescreen customer if I become single again. Good idea.

Customer: “I’ve never flown before, but I’d fly out to see you.”

This is my nightmare. This is it.

Customer: “Or you could come visit Montana.”

I think I’m changing my name and moving to Mexico actually.

Customer: “I’m really fun. Everyone says that I’m so much fun. I really is, I swear it!”

It’s official. I’m changing my name and moving to Mexico.

2 thoughts on “Winston Gets Hit On

  1. You should have scared her off by asking if you could bring your bull whip, testicle weights and gimp suit. Although, given the proclivities of many of your clients, that may only have encouraged her.

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