She’s Just A Receptionist

"This next song is about picking out back-to-school clothes with your Mom. It's called 'Parents Just Don't Understand.'"

Whoa! Things sure look different around ESP. We’re now fresher than Will Smith himself (but not fresher than Jazzy Jeff.) What do you think about the new theme? Futuristic! How about the new logo with George W. Bush himself, officially the most famous ESP ever? Political! How about the new web address, Efficient! Or maybe was already registered. Assholes!

Stupid People Say The Dumbest Fucking Things:

Some psycho gets transferred to me because she’s threatening to contact the Better Business Bureau. This happens daily. Why the fuck should I care if someone files a complaint with the BBB? Am I supposed to get fucking scared or something? All that happens is the BBB contacts Telescreen, then a team of unlucky agents a few cubes down from me gives the angry assholes whatever they want. So I don’t give a shit, these dumbasses can file all the complaints they want. Except this broad meant business. It’s not what you know, but who you know…

Winston: “I’m very sorry ma’am, but I simply can’t credit the early termination fee.”

Customer: “Oh yeah? Well you’re gonna be sorry mister. I’m going straight to the BBB; I have a friend there. That’s right, I know someone at the BBB. She’s just a receptionist, but she still works there!”

Wow. You know the receptionist. Let me give you a little round of applause. I’m sure she’ll direct your call accordingly. Next time, get some better threats. Maybe, “I know a cop, he’s just on the parking lot inspection unit, but he’ll mace the shit out of you!” Or maybe, “I know a lawyer, his office is just in a strip mall, but he’ll sue the shit out of you!” Amateur. 


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