Don’t Blame Me Because You’re Stupid

I may not know much, but I know enough to excel at my shit job. Yeah, I’m aware it’s not that fucking hard to succeed at Telescreen, thank you. I know how to hook up A/V shit and computers pretty well. I also know how to spot a fucking idiot.

Manjula called in to Telescreen because she couldn’t quite figure out how to hook her computer monitor up. She was yelling like a god damn lunatic because she couldn’t figure it out, and somehow, it was my fault. Don’t blame me because you’re stupid, Manjula. Blame your parents for dropping you on your head when you were a baby.

I explained once and she didn’t get it. I explained again and she still didn’t get it. We got up to five explanations and this crazy broad still couldn’t get this fucking thing figured out. Let me lay it down in layman’s terms: You plug the monitor in. Simple as that. No need to get pissed, just a need to get that extremely low IQ up.

We weren’t getting anywhere and I’d had the unfortunate pleasure of talking to Manjula for 45 minutes. She still couldn’t get through her thick skull that you take a cord and simply plug it in. Her pissed off yelling turned to pissed off screaming.

Customer: “Telescreen bad. You break computer. You think you can get away with this? All other computer work. This computer don’t work. You broke computer. You fix computer. You fix now!”

Then Manjula started screaming at me in some language I couldn’t understand. I think it was I Don’t Give A Fuck. English must have been a little too difficult. I got tired of listening, so I put her on mute. I then proceeded to shoot the shit with the guy next to me for a solid five minutes. Once we passed the five minute mark, she tired herself out and hung up. I’m sure she immediately called back to bitch someone else out. I just hope she wasn’t outsourced to India; they probably don’t want to be able to comprehend her Gypsy curses.


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